My oldest son, the Oldest Locke or “OL” to make it simpler, has had his license for a couple of weeks now. That day was tough, man. The little boy that should still be taking his “chupie” (his name for a pacifier), wearing his rubber boots everywhere, and only wearing red shirts, was proudly sitting in the driver’s seat of his car.

Alone.

Meaning, without me or his father.

That day was a lot to process and I had tears on my pillow as I went to be. I’m not going to lie. But let me just say … I think today was even harder.

Today, the three littles asked if OL could take them to school.

In his car.

Meaning, without me or their father.

While I’m thrilled my boys get along so well and well enough to want to spend time together (and to think their brother dropping them off is a positive, fun thing) and I’m even happier to know, without a doubt, that OL will make the best choices and will drive responsibly (and make them buckle up and say their prayers before they go into the school).

Still.

I might’ve found my husband after coming in from standing in the driveway until they were out of sight and told him … “They don’t need me anymore”. Of course, that’s a lie and I know it. But, man, this morning feels like a turning point in my life. The Littlest Locke is 9 (the middles 12 and 14), so I guess this was coming. None of them need me to fix them drinks anymore and they can all wipe their own butts. It just stings a little (no, a lot) that they didn’t need us to drive them to school today.

This is what we raise them for—to grow and be independent and confident. To be capable. To be responsible. To be able to navigate the world on their own a little at a time. But if they could navigate it a little more slowly, that’d be great.

But, hey! There’s still no chance LL#3 will do his homework willingly during Study Hall and will come home needing help because he didn’t even write the instructions down. So I guess I have that to look forward to. (And, for the first time ever, I am. Beggars can’t be choosers.)

xo,

Addy

Alison is a single mom in Sway. Have you met her and her adorable son, Huxley?